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Wednesday, April 25, 2018

I GOT U!


So it's getting towards the end of the school year and today was progress report conference's; I went into these meetings already knowing what the outcome would be for Isaiah and Imani. Imani is in kindergarten and the work is fairly easy for her; she's being doing good the whole school year so I wasn't expecting nothing less than perfect from her. On the other hand I was nervous for Isaiah because although Isaiah is extremely intelligent he's been struggling with math and I already knew in the back of my head that he would be forced to attend summer school this year in order to move on to the 3rd grade; and of course I was right. Let me give y'all a back a story on Isaiah; as a young child the doctors and myself noticed that Isaiah wasn't talking and at this point he was about 2 years old and only expressing himself through sounds and motions. The doctors suggested that Isaiah should be seen by a speech therapist once a week for a year. After autism was ruled out Isaiah made amazing progress in that program and started talking all day everyday LOL.  Once Isaiah started pre-k he wrote his name for the first time and swear that was one of the proudest moments of my life;I posted that on every social media outlet I had at the time. After having a great year of prek and K Isaiah entered 1st grade and that's when I noticed that Isaiah was writing many of his letters and numbers backwards; I brought this to the attention of his teacher and I was constantly reassured that it was normal and that most kids experience this. Now is at the end of his 2nd grade year and the problem hasn't gotten any better and it seems like no one can give me a straight answer on what to do. I feel like since he's been having this problem other problem are starting to branch off from it ,like his math grade suffering and also his lack of attention. I just feel like a failure sometimes because I don't know exactly what the problem is so in return I cant really get to the root to fully help him. I felt so defeated after I left the meeting that I had to call my sisters because I felt like I just wanted to cry because I feel like I'm failing Isaiah by not knowing what to do. Deep down I know how smart Isaiah is because he tells me so many facts and I'm just sitting there looking at him like how does he know this and I don't he makes me feel stupid at times lol!! I promise myself that whatever is going on with Isaiah we will figure it out together. Isaiah I promise that I will help you reach your fullest potential. 😘

Mommy you gotta work late again?

I'm a mother of two children Isaiah my oldest who is 8 years old and my Daughter Imani who is 6 years old,and every time I hear those words mommy you gotta work late again I immediately feel a rush of guilt come over me. I'm an asset protection investigator at a retail store which is just a fancy name for plans clothes security that apprehend shoplifters. So anyone who has every worked in retail knows exactly what I mean when I say the hours can become crazy especially during the Holiday season. My schedule is different every week and I'm off a different day each week.I take my kids to school every morning but I'm only able to put them up from school on a average of twice a week if that; thank God that my mom is able to pick them up each day after she gets off from work. Most days the store doesn't close until 9:30pm which means I don't leave the building until about 10pm and on top of that I don't have a car so I rely on public transportation most nights. when I finally get to my moms house to get that kids its almost 11pm. Once I get to my mom's house that kids are passed out on the couch and I feel so bad that I have to wake them up and drag them out the house so late. We start our mornings at 6:15am and I know they're sleepy so instead of catching the bus when I have extra money I take a lyft home just to get them in the bed faster. I wish all the time that I didn't have to work this job with these crazy hours, but I doing this alone I pay for their education, I live alone and have tons of bills so I have no choice but to keep this job. At times a cry about this and just hope that one day my kids will understand how much I 've sacrificed to keep them happy and give them what they need.

My name is Tasha


I decided to write this blog as place where I can basically use this as my own public diary.  An outlet to express my self and also for other mothers to express themselves; and hopefully come together to share experiences. 
My hope for this blog is that we can all relate, vent, inspire, and give each other words of encouragement. 

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